So I stumbled across this quote by Matt Gemmell recently and it made me stop mid-sip of my overpriced oat milk latte and go, “YES. THIS. FINALLY.” Here it is:
“It’s OK to cut out negative people from your life. Everyone has a right to their opinion, but people don’t have a free pass to be heard by you, particularly if their manner of expression is consistently unpleasant or unproductive.”
I’m not saying I got it tattooed across my chest in Comic Sans, but I did scribble it on a Post-it and slap it on my fridge next to a magnet shaped like a screaming possum. Because let’s be real: some people are walking thunderclouds who never bring snacks or decent conversation to the party. Okay, onto the rant!
Opinions Are Not VIP Tickets
You know that person in your life (or maybe just on your Facebook feed) who thinks “just saying what everyone’s thinking” is an excuse to be a relentless buzzkill or an aggressively loud conspiracy theorist? Yeah. Them. They love to scream “FREE SPEECH!” like it’s a golden ticket to the Chocolate Factory of your attention span.
But here’s the thing—and it’s a big one, like family-reunion-potato-salad big: they have the right to speak, sure. But you also have the glorious, soul-saving, peace-restoring right to not listen. Freedom of speech doesn’t come with a built-in megaphone that points directly at your face 24/7. It’s not some magical force that requires you to sit politely while someone insults your intelligence, identity, or basic sense of decency.
Cutting the Cord (Emotionally, Not Like… the Cable. Unless You Want To.)
There’s a weird guilt that comes with cutting people off, especially if you were raised with that whole “be nice no matter what” kind of vibe. But sometimes? Being “nice” to toxic people just gives them a comfy seat on the couch of your life, where they can kick off their muddy boots and spread negativity like glitter at a toddler’s birthday party. And glitter, as we all know, never leaves.
So let’s just say it out loud: You don’t have to keep someone in your life just because you’ve known them since high school or they’re your second cousin or they once lent you a lawn chair in 2009. If someone constantly makes you feel like trash wrapped in tinfoil, you are not obligated to keep giving them access to your emotional bandwidth.
Especially Now
Have you noticed how everyone suddenly has a podcast or a TikTok where they’re just… confidently wrong? Like, proudly peddling conspiracy theories they found in a Reddit thread written by a guy whose profile picture is a lizard smoking a cigar?
There’s a lot of noise out there right now. Political bile. Unfounded rage. Deep-fried misinformation. People using “opinion” as a shield for racism, bigotry, and just plain being a jerk. And if you’re anything like me, it starts to feel like walking through a crowded room where everyone’s yelling into a megaphone made of static.
You don’t owe your mental health to every loudmouth with a hot take. You are not a public service announcement. You are not a debate moderator. You are not legally required to “hear both sides” when one side is spouting hatred wrapped in the American flag and the other side is just trying to, you know, exist.
My New Mantra: Block, Mute, Repeat
Let’s normalize saying “No thanks” to garbage energy. Let’s normalize muting people who drain us. Let’s normalize unfollowing the guy who thinks the moon landing was faked and that oat milk is a government mind-control serum (okay, I might listen to that one just for the entertainment value).
Cutting someone out doesn’t make you cruel. It makes you the bouncer at the club of your own sanity.
So yeah…
There’s a weird kind of freedom in reminding yourself that your attention is a privilege, not a guarantee. You can walk away from people who turn every conversation into a rage-fueled monologue. You can reclaim your headspace. You can choose joy, quiet, curiosity, love, literally anything other than someone else’s performative rage.
So here’s to turning down the volume, unfollowing without guilt, and leaving toxic folks on “read” forever. Your peace of mind deserves a little VIP treatment.
P.S. If someone’s ever told you “you’re too sensitive” just for asking to be treated with basic respect… they’re the problem, not you.